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Lawyer: Do you know that cocaine is highly addictive?
Me: Yes, I’ve heard that.
Lawyer: Do you know that about 80% of the people in prison are there on drug charges? Don’t you think that’s a bit harsh?
Me: My understanding is that this jury has the responsibility to make a decision based on the merits of this case. A discussion of the severity of drug laws and penalties is something you’ll have to take up with the Legislature.
Lawyer: But don’t you think it’s unfair for the police to take advantage of people who are addicted?
Me: I reject the premise of the question. Enforcing the law is not taking advantage of someone. When I was pulled over for speeding, the officer wasn’t taking advantage of me, he was doing his job. (I wish I had said, “I was unaware that people who are addicted are subject to a different set of laws than non-addicts.”)
Lawyer: Thank you juror #11.
Not long after that I was dismissed. Go figure.
3 comments:
Mike, I think a better response would have been, "You're a poop-head!"
Sounds like the lawyer may have been smoking something himself!
haha, i love it!
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