Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Jury Duty

Yesterday I had to report for Jury Duty. I actually made it into the Jury Box this time. Both lawyers sort of interviewed the potential jurists. Then they eliminated five of us, including yours truly. I‘m pretty sure that defense attorneys want to eliminate anyone who has any common sense. The trial was for a drug charge – a guy was arresting for dealing cocaine. Our conversation went something like this:

Lawyer: Do you know that cocaine is highly addictive?

Me: Yes, I’ve heard that.

Lawyer: Do you know that about 80% of the people in prison are there on drug charges? Don’t you think that’s a bit harsh?

Me: My understanding is that this jury has the responsibility to make a decision based on the merits of this case. A discussion of the severity of drug laws and penalties is something you’ll have to take up with the Legislature.

Lawyer: But don’t you think it’s unfair for the police to take advantage of people who are addicted?

Me: I reject the premise of the question. Enforcing the law is not taking advantage of someone. When I was pulled over for speeding, the officer wasn’t taking advantage of me, he was doing his job. (I wish I had said, “I was unaware that people who are addicted are subject to a different set of laws than non-addicts.”)

Lawyer: Thank you juror #11.

Not long after that I was dismissed. Go figure.


Joe said...

Mike, I think a better response would have been, "You're a poop-head!"

David H. Willis said...

Sounds like the lawyer may have been smoking something himself!

Conley said...

haha, i love it!