Going to Iowa

I'm heading to Iowa this afternoon. I'm going to spend a couple of days there visiting relatives, etc. Maybe I'll get a chance to play golf with my Dad and brother.

Another One of My Preaching Heroes

A couple of months ago I posted about listening to Ed Bousman preach. Tonight I got to hear another one of my preaching heroes, Ray Bennett. I met Ray in 1987 when I heard him preach at the Hillsboro Family Camp. Never in my life had I heard that kind of fiery preaching. Preaching that he calls, "heaven-high, hell-deep, world-wide and shotgun barrel straight." Ray is one-of-a-kind. He has always been gracious and encouraging to me. When I was just a rookie preacher he invited me to preach at the Delmarva Family Camp in Delaware (I will be preaching there again this year). He preached several times at the church I served in Virginia. He and his wife Gyneth are wonderful people. They have the love and respect of the Kjergaard family.

Ray is in our area this weekend preaching in a Revival meeting. It was great to hear him again. He's still got it.

Looking Forward to Sunday

Tommy Boy Moment

Tracy and her father left this morning for Virginia. They are picking up Grandma, who spent the winter there, and bringing her back home to Michigan. About mid-morning I gave Tracy a call to see how they were doing. She said they had a little setback -- while they were driving down Highway 30 THE HOOD FLEW UP (a la Tommy Boy). What in the world!? Somehow Ray hadn't latched his hood after he checked his fluids (and apparently the safety precaution second latch thing wasn't working). That must have been quite an experience. So he has a dented hood and a cracked windshield. What a way to start a 14 hour trip. Holy snikes!

Softball Season Starts Tonight

We have our first Church League game tonight. Cedar Creek 1 vs. Cedar Creek 2. The good news is that no matter what, Cedar Creek wins. I love to play, but every year my arm tells me that I'm not as young as I once was.

Christian Pick-Up Lines

Our intern (a single guy) sent me these. Enjoy.

1. "Nice Bible."
2. "Is this pew taken?"
3. "For you I would slay two Goliaths"
4. "You are so unblemished that I would sacrifice you."
5. "I didn't believe in predestination until tonight."
6. "I know Bob Russell."
7. (if no.6 gains no response) "Bob Russell knows me"
8. "Bible-gateway happens to be my homepage."
9. "Can I buy you a non-alcoholic beverage?"
10. "Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives... Because he never met you."
11. "Is that a thinline, duo-tone, compact, ESV Travel Bible in your pocket"
12. "So, my parents are home, you wanna come over?"
14. "Let's say, hypothetically, you were married. I would send your husband to the front line against the Amorites"
15. "I'm interested in full time ministry, and not only that... I also play the guitar."
16."Look, you're nearly 22. most Christians are 3 years into marriage by now... just settle for me."
17. "Who's your favorite apostle?"
18. "You make the Queen of Sheba look like a hobo."
19. "I have familiarised myself with all 5 love languages, in fact, I invented 4 of them."
20. 'All I'm looking for is a Godly woman. I don't care that you're not attractive.'
21. "If you were a leper, I would still hold your hand.. even if it wasn't attached."

Only in America

Third Day's New Album

I just found out that my favorite band is releasing a new album on July 29. Oh yeah.

That's Powerful

I arrived home yesterday to find pieces of a tree scattered all over my yard. The lamppost was destroyed and things were a mess. What happened!? Neighbors confirmed that lightning hit the tree (both described the sound like a transformer blowing up).
Several of our electronic appliances are messed up. Our big television, two VCRs, and the coffeemaker don't work at all. Another television has its color all out of whack. I will probably have to get a tree company to deal with the tree. Insurance company says we have a $500 deductible. Isn't home ownership fun?

Happy Birthday Luke!

My son turns 13 today. Where does the time go? It seems like only yesterday he was playing with legos and stuffed animals. Now he is into skateboarding, camcorders, and classic rock. We're going to have a good time celebrating his entrance into the teen years. Happy birthday son!

Idol Controversy

If any of you are American Idol fans, you know that there was a little mix-up on Tuesday night -- Paula got a little, shall we say, "confused." I checked some blogs the next day, and this quote made me chuckle:

They say nothing is certain but death and taxes, but that’s only because ‘nothing is certain except death, taxes and Paula Abdul acting all crazy boogaloo’ is too long.

Church Autonomy

I just finished an article for my column in reIGNITED (a quarterly magazine for Christian Churches in Canada. Beauty, eh?). I thought I would share it here:

Restoration Movement churches have been described as nondenominational or independent or locally autonomous. What do those terms mean? Occasionally I meet someone who is interested in learning more about the church I serve. He might say, “Tell me about your church.” I have discovered that using those descriptors usually leaves the person more confused than enlightened. Explaining the structure of locally independent churches that are part of a loosely-knit fellowship or brotherhood is not as easy as one might think.

Our Restoration Movement forefathers were not seeking to start another denomination. They saw the problems inherent with a hierarchical structure in which the average church member often had little influence. Their back-to-the-Bible philosophy prompted scores of congregations to sever their denominational ties and become independent Christian churches.

Locally autonomy brings several wonderful advantages to a congregation. First, the church is led by elders (pastors) who know the congregation and the community. The apostle Paul told Titus, “Appoint elders in every town as I directed you” (Titus 1:5). In the book of Acts and in some of the epistles we find references to local church leaders. These leaders prayerfully determine the direction and vision for the congregation. They also help ensure that the church stays on course doctrinally.

Another benefit comes in the area of missions support. Rather than sending missions funds to the denominational headquarters to be distributed to missionaries with whom the congregation has little relationship, the church decides at the local level whom it wishes wish to support. It develops a personal connection with the missionaries and parachurch organizations, sometimes sending church members on short-term mission trips. It can also respond directly to specific needs (as in Acts 11). There is also good stewardship to consider. Funds go to the specific mission, rather than also feeding the denominational “machine” (buildings, personnel, etc.).

Another important advantage is that the church is free to practice its faith without fear of outside interference. It is independent of any governing authority (other than the Lord and the Word of God) dictating what it will believe and practice. The congregation can allow the Bible alone to serve as its only rule of faith and practice. Its leaders can implement Restoration Movement principles as they lead people in to a growing relationship with the Lord.

With this emphasis on independence, perhaps a word of caution is in order. Restoration Movement churches have sometimes been guilty of being “too independent.” Local autonomy is wonderfully biblical. But the local church is part of the larger, universal body of Christ. New Testament churches frequently helped one another and partnered with each other in spreading the gospel. The Apostle Peter tell us to, “love the brotherhood of believers” (1 Peter 2:17). Even in our independence, let’s be the kind of people our fellow believers can depend on.

Weekend Plans

We're looking forward to a fun weekend. Our friends Ward and Tonja Rose are up this way for a singing gig. We're going to spend some time with them on Saturday. Some other friends, John & Renee Mitchell are in the Rose's new hometown -- Nashville, for the Country Music Marathon.

After the race, the Mitchells are coming up here for a couple of days. Renee is active duty Air Force and is home for a couple of weeks from her year-long assignment in Turkey.
Old friends from Northampton, we always have a good time with the Roses and Mitchells.


Have a great weekend everybody!

Believe Conference

The Believe conference was awesome. I'm one of those strange people who loves junior high kids (probably because I am STILL that age on the inside). CIY knows how to do things right. Believe rocked!

Junior High Fun

This weekend I will be attending a CIY Believe conference with some Junior High students from Cedar Creek (including my son). Tracy and I used to enjoy going to the Virginia Christian Teen Convention, but it has been several years since I have been to an event like this. I'm looking forward to it.

Spring!

I had the day off today. It was a gorgeous day. I mowed the grass for the first time this spring. It probably could have waited a few more days. But firing up my John Deere lawn tractor and donning a flannel shirt, I was in full redneck mode, and loving it!

Godly Shepherds

We had our monthly elders meeting last night. My favorite part each month is the time we spend in prayer. We share in a meal together and one of the brothers leads a devotion. Then we spend about 40 minutes in prayer. I know that lots of meetings begin with a perfunctory "word of prayer", but the tone of our meeting has changed since we began spending significant time pouring out our hearts before the Lord -- seeking his guidance, praying for the flock, asking for wisdom. I wish the church family could know how much they are really loved by their shepherds. Seeing men of God shed tears over the hurts of the flock and passionately seek the face of God, desperately wanting to make the right decisions for the body -- it warms my heart and encourages my soul. Pray for your elders today. Theirs is a noble task.

I Want You to Want Me

Preaching about Joseph and Potiphar's wife this weekend. I think this might be what she said to him...

American Idol Sings "Shout to the Lord"

My family watches "American Idol" regularly. We were pleasantly surprised to see the contestants on last night's "Idol Gives Back" show singing one of my favorite songs, Shout to the Lord. Yes, they edited it a bit, changing "my Jesus" to "my shepherd", and some of the bloggers are upset about that. And I could have done without Ben Stiller's bleep-filled rant that ended the show (someone's idea of humor, I guess). But still, I'm going to rejoice that the #1 show in America aired a song of praise to the King. Someone made that decision. The song will be downloaded from iTunes all over the world. How awesome is that? View clip here.

UPDATE: They did it again tonight and sang the name of Jesus.

Red Robin Rocks!

Yesterday I traveled to Lansing, Michigan to speak to the preaching class at Great Lakes Christian College. It was a lot of fun. I can really get passionate talking about preaching. Afterwards, my friend Mark Christian and I went to supper at Red Robin. I think I ate the most deliciously awesome burger I have ever consumed. The Bleu Ribbon Burger was incredibly good.

Jury Duty

Yesterday I had to report for Jury Duty. I actually made it into the Jury Box this time. Both lawyers sort of interviewed the potential jurists. Then they eliminated five of us, including yours truly. I‘m pretty sure that defense attorneys want to eliminate anyone who has any common sense. The trial was for a drug charge – a guy was arresting for dealing cocaine. Our conversation went something like this:

Lawyer: Do you know that cocaine is highly addictive?

Me: Yes, I’ve heard that.

Lawyer: Do you know that about 80% of the people in prison are there on drug charges? Don’t you think that’s a bit harsh?

Me: My understanding is that this jury has the responsibility to make a decision based on the merits of this case. A discussion of the severity of drug laws and penalties is something you’ll have to take up with the Legislature.

Lawyer: But don’t you think it’s unfair for the police to take advantage of people who are addicted?

Me: I reject the premise of the question. Enforcing the law is not taking advantage of someone. When I was pulled over for speeding, the officer wasn’t taking advantage of me, he was doing his job. (I wish I had said, “I was unaware that people who are addicted are subject to a different set of laws than non-addicts.”)

Lawyer: Thank you juror #11.

Not long after that I was dismissed. Go figure.

Happy April Fools' Day

Opening Day

Today is Opening Day for most MLB teams (including my beloved Cubs). Could this be their year? Some sports guys say so, which is kinda scary. But they are due. Hey, anyone can have a bad century, right? Go Cubs!

Listening to a Legend

My family and I had the privilege of hearing Ed Bousman preach tonight at the Church of Christ at Harlan. Nearly 90 years old, he's still got it.

I first heard Ed preach over 20 years ago at the Hillsboro Family Camp. I remember being impressed by his incredible memory. He has memorized the entire New Testament and preaches without notes, quoting lengthy passages of Scripture. Occasionally he would visit the church where I preached. Northampton was planted by Ed's home church in Newport News. It was intimidating to look into the crowd and see Ed! But he has always been kind and gracious to me. It was great to see him again.

(Dave Willis, he did ask about you!)

Majoring in the Minors

Our Winter/Spring session of The Well (our mid-week service) concluded last night. I preached through the Minor Prophets. It was a whirlwind tour -- 12 prophets in 12 weeks. But it was good to revisit those oft-overlooked books. At times the messages were a little depressing (most of them were sent to rebuke God's people), but God's grace came through. He was always willing to forgive and reinstate those who repented and returned to him (no matter how rotten they had been). Many of the prophets gave glimmers of hope of the coming Messiah.

As I studied these guys, it occurred to me that my job is similar to theirs. Preach a prophetic message that we need to get/keep our lives right with the Lord. And no matter how bad we've been, God will take us back when we repent and return to him. And Jesus is coming!

More About Sunday

Sunday at The Creek rocked! We had a sonrise service with tradtional music and a sermon/devo, followed by breakfast, then our regular services. We showed this video at the beginning. Then the praise team did a wonderful job leading us in worship. One of the elders did a communion meditation about the baggage that we carry (he brought three pieces of luggage onto the stage and talked about the stuff that’s inside that we needlessly carry around — and encouraged us to leave our baggage at the foot of the cross). A lady sang Nicole C. Mullen’s “Redeemer.” Then the band did a version of “Angus Dei” (with another elder reading from Rev. 5 during the middle of it). It was powerful.

I finshed up my series on “Discovering the Real Jesus” (with this video as the intro). I preached from John 20.

Wrapped up the service with a rockin’ version of “Power in the Blood” (it’s on one of Selah’s albums) and “My Redeemer Lives.”

We were all really pumped up (oh, and we also had near-record attendance). Yay God!

Resurrection Sunday

Today was the 21st consecutive Easter Sunday that I've had the privilege of preaching about the resurrection of Jesus. It never gets old. The Apostle Paul said it is the foundation of our faith:

Now I make known to you, brethren, the gospel which I preached to you, which also you received, in which also you stand, by which also you are saved, if you hold fast the word which I preached to you, unless you believed in vain. For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received, that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, and that He was buried, and that He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures...
(1 Corinthians 15:1-5).

We had some great services at Cedar Creek today. I hope that you did some celebrating too. "He has risen, just as He said!"

Freaky Friday

I'm glad I don't have money on any of the NCAA games. Yesterday was tough -- I picked the following teams to win: Indiana, Clemson, Vanderbilt, Gonzaga, Drake, and UConn. All of them lost. I had Vandy, USC, and UConn in my Sweet Sixteen. D'oh! But at least my Final Four is still intact.

Bracket Busted

After going a perfect 8 for 8 in the early games, I got my bracket busted courtesy of USC. Oh, and I also had Winthrop winning (pulling for the underdog). I had USC going to the Elite Eight. Duke too -- and they almost lost to Belmont! That's why it's called March Madness, eh?

Winter Storm Watch?

On the first day of Spring, our friends from the Weather Channel share this with us:

...WINTER STORM WATCH REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM FRIDAY MORNING THROUGH SATURDAY MORNING... A WINTER STORM WATCH REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM FRIDAY MORNING THROUGH SATURDAY MORNING. SNOW IS EXPECTED TO DEVELOP NEAR LAKE MICHIGAN DURING THE EARLY MORNING FRIDAY. AS THE SYSTEM CONTINUES TO MOVE EAST...THE AREA OF SNOW WILL EXPAND...AND SPREAD EAST DURING THE DAY FRIDAY. BY 8 AM EDT / 7 AM CDT SATURDAY...POSSIBLE SNOW ACCUMULATION WILL RANGE FROM 4 TO 8 INCHES...WITH THE HEAVIEST SNOW ALONG THE INDIANA/MICHIGAN BORDER.

Go Irish!

Rethinking My Bracket

I'm already starting to second-guess my bracket (I still have time to change it). Should I have picked Winthrop to beat Washington State? I picked Clemson to lose, but they are pretty good. And should I have picked IU instead of Arkansas? And I would love to see Michigan State go to the Final Four rather than Memphis, but can the Spartans do it? I don't want to pull a Mike Golic and fill out several different brackets, but I don't want to get beat by my Music Minister who knows nothing about sports.

March Madness

If you are a college hoops fan, this is your time of year! The NCAA Tournament brackets were revealed last night. I'm in a couple of bracket contests/pools -- one with work, and another with family. A little friendly competition. I've got North Caronlina, Kansas, Memphis, and UCLA in my Final Four, with Carolina winning it all (it seems like I pick them almost every year). Let the games begin!

Have a Great Weekend Everybody!

National Preaching Summit

I had the privilege of attending the National Preaching Summit in Indy this week. I always look forward to this event because it gets me all fired up about preaching. Bob Russell and Jeff Walling were outstanding, but I think what impacted me most was Ben Merold. You see, Ben wasn't a speaker this year, he was just one of the attendees. 82 years old and still going to seminars to learn how to improve his craft. Wow.

Rough Week

I finally went to the doctor yesterday. He said I have a virus that simply needs to run its course. Thanks Doc! This has been a rough week for our church staff. Three out the four full-timers were out all week. Next week has got to get better, right? But I do have a greater appreciation for my usually good health.

Flu Bug

I've been sick for a couple of days. I'm rarely sick, so I'm not a good patient. I've been running a fever, and coughing like crazy -- basically feeling lousy. Yesterday was the first time in 21 years of ministry that I missed a preaching assignment due to illness. My good friend Mark Christian pinch-hit for me in the GLCC Chapel.

Things aren't looking too good for tonight's service at Cedar Creek. I'm still running a fever. Probably the most loving thing I could do for my church family is to stay away from them.

The Doty Center

Yesterday I had the privilege of visiting my alma mater for the dedication of The Doty Center. Named in honor of long-time GLCC professor Dr. Brant Lee Doty, this building was dedicated to the glory of God. What a great day it was! It was a real GLCC reunion! It was great to see the multi-generational crowd. God was honored.

Day Three

Another long day, but it was a blessing. I heard one of my favorite preachers (Cam Huxford). He did a great job. So did Chris Seidman. I attended a couple of good workshops about preaching. The closing program tonight featured Bob Russell. He's still got it.

Day Two

Today was a long day with lots of sessions. I heard Reggie Epps talk about breaking growth barriers. It was very good. Then I heard Aaron Brockett preach at a main session. In the afternoon I went to a couple of workshops dealing with elder-staff relationships. It was led by some elders of the Oronogo Christian Church. Excellent. Then tonight Rick Rusaw preached.

Looking forward to hearing Cam Huxford and Chris Seidman tomorow.

Day One

It was a great start to the Preaching-Teaching Convention. We were challenged, encouraged, stretched, and enlightened.

Dr. Chuck Sackett preached about Jeremiah's call. It was a tremendous message. It reminded me of how blessed I am to be a preacher of the gospel. I still feel a strong calling from the Lord. There is nothing I would rather be doing.

It was my first time to hear Kyle Idleman preach. Wow. That guy is good. Very young and very gifted.

Preaching-Teaching Convention

I'm leaving today for Joplin, MO. I will be attending the Preaching-Teaching Convention at Ozark Christian College. It should be a lot of fun. My good friend John Mitchell (who preaches near Kansas City) will meet me there. I'll blog some reports if I'm able.

P.S. The elders retreat was AWESOME. I am blessed to serve with godly men who love the Lord and His church.

Elders Retreat

Tonight I'll join the elders of our church in an overnight retreat at a local camp. I'm looking forward to hanging out with these brothers; praying and planning and learning and growing in our faith and leadership. God has blessed me with some great guys to serve with.

Wienermobile Wipes Out

Let's be frank: motor vehicle accidents aren't much fun for anyone. But when a 27-foot-long tube-steak spins out on a snow-covered highway, it's bound to generate some grins. That's what happened Sunday to an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile (at least it didn't roll over). The two 22-year-olds in the vehicle knew they were in hot water when they hit an icy patch, but they weren’t hotdogging. It was not an experience they would relish, but they are none the wurst for wear.

Full story here.

Choppin' Broccoli

I wonder how old I will be before I stop referencing stuff from the 80's? Last night I starting singing "Choppin' Broccoli." Tracy laughed but the kids looked at me like I was crazy. So we had to go online and find this classic.

He's Back!

What NOT to Get Her for Valentine's Day

What NOT to give her for Valentines Day:

1. A box of chocolates, clumsily rearranged in an attempt to hide the fact you ate all the caramel ones.

2. Anything that even remotely implies that she is not physically perfect: gym memberships, Botox, diet plan subscriptions, self help books and the like.

3. Any video starring Sylvester Stallone, Jim Carrey, or Angelina Jolie.

4. Any clothing item with the words "push-up" or "slim-down" on the label.

5. Appliances. Every man has made this mistake. Just because she says, "I need a new vacuum" does not mean you should buy her a vacuum.

6. Homemade coupons. Whether they're for dish duty, garbage duty, dinner, or something else, she's not likely to be impressed. Did your high school girlfriend even use hers?

7. Any food item with the words "diet", "light", or "high fiber" on the label.

8. Any gift you once bought for an ex-girlfriend. She will find out--and punish you.

9. Anything you could have bought at the gas station mini-mart on the way home, even if you didn't.

10. An apologetic look and the words "That was today?"

Senator McCain Wants My Vote

I received three phone calls today. Each was a recording of Senator McCain urging me to vote for him in the Virginia primary. Here's the thing -- I haven't lived in Virginia since August 2003. You'd think my INDIANA phone number might give his campaign a clue.

Christianese Translated

I got the following from Mark Waltz's blog (he got it from someone else who borrowed it from another -- it's funny regardless of origin):

The following is a list of phrases in the impenetrable language of "Christianese." For those unfamiliar with this strange dialect, below you'll find a helpful Christianese-English Dictionary so that you can find out what your Christian friend is really saying to you.
1. I'll pray about it = NO!
2. We need to pray for so and so = Guess what I just heard?!
3. I'm waiting for God to open some doors = I'm living in my parent's basement.
4. God gave me a word for you = I have advice to help you with your disaster of a life.
5. I'm going to have my quiet time = Leave me the heck alone!
6. God is good = My life sucks.
7. Bless his/her heart = What an idiot.
8. I have the gift of discernment = I can judge people without even talking to them.
9. I was having fellowship with them = We had beer and pizza and watched the game instead of going to church.
10. I'm saved by grace, not works = I can do whatever the heck I want.
11. She caused me to stumble = What a skank.
12. I kissed dating goodbye = I couldn't get a blind date, literally.
13. Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouth = I can't believe you said the real curse word!
14. I don't mean to judge but... = I'm going to judge.
15. I'm dating Jesus right now = Are you kidding? I'm way out of your league.
16. God wants me to take some time off from this relationship = I met someone else and I'm too coward to break up with you.
17. I'll pray about marrying you = NO!
18. God told me that we are supposed to get married = Maybe you'll say yes if God is behind this.
19. I'm fasting = Your spiritual life is miniscule compared to mine. Try to keep up.
20. God has called me to minister to her = She's really hot.
21. I think you should pray about it = You'll see that I'm right.
22. We've decided to court, not date = My parents have a death grip on my life.
23. Courting = Homeschool dating.
24. Lord willing = My plans are His plans.
25. Take this with a grain of salt = I'm about to really offend you.
26. I'm feeling convicted about this = One day my actions might change too!
27. Have I offended you? = Why are you treating my like garbage?
28. Who wants to pray? = I don't want to pray right now.
29. Jesus turned water into wine = Jesus turned water into grape juice. (Southern Baptist Dialect)
30. Jesus turned water into wine = I can drink whatever I want. (Presbyterian Dialect)

Gettin' the Led Out

I love amazon.com. Yesterday they delivered to my house the latest Led Zeppelin CD/DVD, Mothership. It has all the hits and then some.

Rob Bell Parody

If you've seen any of Rob Bell's "Nooma" videos, you might enjoy this spoof.

Nick at Night

I'm preaching this week from John chapter 3 where Jesus has an encounter with Nicodemus. The famous "You must be born again" text (although some dispute whether the "water" in v. 5 is baptism, I believe that a strong case can be made that it is). It's a shame that verses often get ripped from their context. There is some great teaching in John 3:1-21. The most famous verse in all of Scripture is here (John 3:16) -- yet that verse isn't on an island by itself, it's a part of a larger conversation.

I love Jesus' allusion to the snake-bitten Israelites (Numbers 21 , where God sent venomous snakes to bite those complainers. But he relented and told Moses to make a bronze snake for them to look upon and be saved). Jesus indicates that just as Moses lifted up the snake, He must be lifted up (on a pole/tree) and people must look to him for salvation.

If in verse 5 Jesus is referring to baptism (which would become part of the kingdom entrance requirements), then baptism is our bronze snake (provided by God's grace).

Do you know what happened to that bronze snake? Israel began to worship it! (2 Kings 18:4). They began to make an idol out of the means/instrument/mode/tool of salvation rather than GOD who made salvation possible. I wonder if we sometimes slip into the same thing with our bronze snake (baptism). Was looking at the snake necessary? Sure, if they wanted to be saved. Is baptism (new birth) necessary? Of course. But let's remember that it is God who gets the glory/credit for our salvation, not us.

Thank You Giants!

Star of Bethlehem

I know the season has passed, but we're just getting around to watching a DVD that a friend loaned to us. The Star of Bethlehem was awesome!

Mandles

This made me laugh.

Ultimate Fighting Championship

My father-in-law has been staying with us and he is a huge boxing and fighting fan. We have been watching a lot of UFC. Those guys are insane, but it's fun to watch.

Busy Weekend

I was gone all Friday at a Trustees Meeting at my alma mater. Then I went straight to our church camp for our annual Men’s Retreat. We had a great time — 35 guys experienced some wonderful fellowship and some in-depth teaching by my good friend Mark Christian (we have known each other since we were 10 years old). He also preached at Cedar Creek yesterday and did an outstanding job.

Purina Diet

My friend John Dobbs told this true story about an incident that happended to him at Wal-Mart:

I have 2 large dogs, and was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. The woman behind me asked if I had a dog? Duh.

On impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn’t because I’d ended up in the hospital the last time. But I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes everywhere and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy who was standing behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me?

I told her no, I’d been sitting in the street waiting for a car to chase, when another car hit me.

I thought the guy standing behind her was going to need help as he staggered to the door laughing.

I Am Your Brother

Ah'll Be Bach (or will I?)

If you think it through, time travel in movies/television never really works. Yes, I watched The Sarah Connor Chronicles (I just couldn’t turn away) – Sunday night, but I missed last night’s episode. I have to admit that it wasn’t as cheesy as I thought it might be (and wouldn’t a teenage boy prefer a pretty teenage girl terminator to Ah-nold anyway?)But here’s my time travel conundrum. If the Terminators come back from the future to kill young John Connor, thus preventing him from doing whatever heroic thing he’s going to do as an adult, then they never would have existed anyway, right? Like, let’s say my parents beat me when I was a child. So I think, “I’ll fix them”, and I build a time machine and go back to the 1960’s and keep them from ever meeting each other, that way they won’t beat me when I’m born. But wait, I will never BE born, so I won’t be able to go back and keep myself from being beaten. Are you still with me?

It works in the other direction too. If I could jump forward to, say 2027, to find myself eating breakfast at the house I built, I couldn’t meet myself, since I wouldn’t have been there during the time I missed (I couldn’t have built the house, etc.). Does anyone remember the movie Timecop (starring Jean Claude Van Damme)? Oh right. Of course not. I had the same problem with that movie. He went back 10 years to prevent his wife’s murder. And some politician went ahead into time and met himself (their bodies touched and he blew up or something). And then when Timecop went back to the present and mentioned the Senator, people looked at him strangely and said, “The Senator disappeared 10 years ago, never to be seen again” (or something like that, my memory is fuzzy).

The math never works. It’s an endless cycle. If you could travel to the past to meet yourself, you'd probably just end up erasing your future you, which would be your current you. And once you do travel back in time, the present becomes the future that has not yet happened.

Queen Esther

Last night for Family Movie Night we watched One Night With the King. It tells the biblical story of Esther, a Jewish girl who becomes Queen of Persia and saves her people from annihilation. Of course the filmmakers used some artistic license, but they stayed mostly true to the biblical account. We enjoyed it.

Ob La De, Ob La Da, Obadiah

I decided to preach through the Minor Prophets for our winter/spring session of The Well (our Wednesday night program). So I started staring at the book of Obadiah, asking, “What was I thinking?”

But tonight's service/sermon actually went pretty well.

Moron Arrested After Driving Truck Into House

You can't make this stuff up.

Luke's Baptism